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Thursday, May 29, 2008

So I'll just throw this onto the front page


So I originally put this as a comment on my own blog. Then I realized THIS IS MY OWN BLOG! I don't need to relegate my important thoughts to no stinkin' comments. Katie's and my thoughts are the most important things in this little world we have created. So I'm publishing myself on the front page! 

Katie read what I wrote in my last post and said she didn't really understand what I was trying to say. It looks like Terri did get what I was trying to say. I hear what you are saying Aaron and I agree with Brad in that there should not be "expectations" from a wife for more than a comfortable house in a good neighborhood and showing respect to your life (what's the definition of a run-on sentence by the way?).  

That brings me to an unrelated topic but one I feel strongly about (even though it drives Katie crazy). I feel very strongly that there should not be expectations above those things Brad has mentioned. If that is all your husband is able to give you, you are luckier than a large percentage of women out there. I feel like a lot of harm is done by "expecting" the above and beyond things from your spouse. We should only be thankful when they do occur but not disappointed when they do not. 

Anyway that was a tangent. So anyway my basic point for the Katie's in the world who didn't quite get it was that I would love to have a marriage where you are still courting each other, not in the idea that you are trying to impress them but that you are constantly thinking of ways to make them smile, laugh, feel good, and feel loved. The way we all were when we were courting. That you are thinking of creative date ideas (or even going on dates for some of us), that you are texting or emailing or writing nice things to them. Not because you aren't comfortable with them or because you are trying to impress them but because you want to brighten their day or make them feel a little better about life or themselves. Anyway this is much too long. Suffice to say I admire those who do this better than I. 

I think this blogging thing is kind of funny. Like Terri said, you never know what your neighbors are thinking. At least it is better than seeing them walking through their house in their underwear.

So here's a little addendum. I finally figured out which brad posted the previous comment. I thought it was my buddy from Oregon. Then I clicked on the name and found out it was my white sheeted, redneck, male chauvinist southern friend Milkwick. Now it makes perfect sense. Just kidding. It's good to hear from you buddy. Glad to see you finally settled down and made something of yourself. All this time I thought you were floating the rivers of China getting large tips from large, drunk, middle aged women.

Monday, May 19, 2008

Marriage 101


A few Sunday's ago as I was driving to or from the Instacare (my home away from home) there was a program on my beloved KSL about marriage.  The "expert" was saying how he is always counseling guys to be creative and fun in their marriage.  The guys always complain that it is impossible because they just aren't creative people.  
The expert then said how we are all fun and creative during courtship, otherwise we'd still be single.  At the time I thought the guy was just spouting platitudes and was mildly annoyed that people get paid to observe the obvious.  Well tonight as the milk cup hit the floor for the 5th time at Red Lobster and Cordon dumped the last Nutrasweet packet onto the table I realized how true it is.  
So yeah it is obvious and we all know it and we're all too lazy/tired to do it but practically every marriage could be improved if we had the same gusto now as we did when we were so funny/creative/smart/quirky or whatever other adjective we tried to portray ourselves as during those wonderful courtship months.  I'll bet everyone out there (except 8 month pregnant Katie who swears otherwise) would suddenly have newfound energy that at the present point they claim not to have, if suddenly they were back courting that special someone.  
So what is the point of all this.....nothing really.  I read other blogs and read people's pontifications on random subjects and I thought I'd join the fray.  Since our readership at this point is pretty minimal no one really cares.  I thought I'd just ramble a bit.  
There are those out there that I admire.  Maybe it is all a facade (did you know that I thought facade was "fackade" until well into my college years and that there was another word out there pronounced fasad that had a similar meaning as the "fackade" I was always reading about in books...go figure) but as I read blogs and see people in action I am inspired, if only briefly until my natural laziness kicks in, by their continual courtship.  Something I definitely long for and strive for.  So for those of you keeping the courtship alive in your marriage my hat is off to you and I look up to you.  My seminary teacher once told me that in the afterlife when we are all standing around admiring each other's white jumpsuits and dresses that someone will say there is a person who kept courtship alive in their marriage!  Then a hush will fall over the crowd and everyone will kneel in their presence....At least I think that was the story, the details are a little fuzzy.

Thursday, May 15, 2008

Im questioning the wisdom in my decision to give Lance blogging access.  However, I guess he will give the world a more realistic look into our lives.  I was happy with my little rose colored filter that I could use to control the impression we give to fellow bloggers.  Alas, we are who we are, toilet dreams and all!  Still I will let Lance give the poop scoop on our lives and I'll stick with the "isn't that cute" edition.

Wednesday, May 14, 2008

I'm on the toilet right now


So I know this is a family blog and I'm not sure who all actually reads it but I just wanted to let everyone know that I'm fulfilling one of my childhood.....well maybe not childhood but last 5 years anyway...dreams.  So back in the day when I worked for Nuskin they would give me a laptop to use when I traveled overseas.  Nuskin also had this 1-800 dial-up number for internet access.  The apartment we lived in at the time also had a phone jack above the toilet, we couldn't figure that one out when we first moved in.  So anyway these 3 random events came together in a perfect storm one evening after returning home from whatever Asian country I had been in.  I didn't have to turn the laptop in until the following day.  For the first and only time in my life I was reading BYU message boards from the comfort of my own toilet.  Ever since that time I've dreamed of it happening again.  Reader's Digests, the scriptures, the back of the toilet bowel cleaner bottle, these things have only kept my dream at bay but have never really fulfilled it.  Well about a month ago I was able to get a macbook and with this thing called wireless internet I am now able to write a blog entry while ridding myself of unwanted goods.  And no I'm not an incredibly fast typer...As anyone who knows me can attest...Bathroom time is Lance time.  That is my time to be by myself and relax.  Man I love fiber!

Tuesday, May 13, 2008

Now I actually have my own name!!!





I just figured out how to change it so my name will show at the bottom of the screen.  Katie granted me admin privileges after only 1 trial post.  Now I have to try it out to make sure it works.  

So a couple weekends ago we had our annual Barker weenie roast.  I'm not sure if Katie has fully embraced roasting processed meat rejects, on a stick, over an open fire.  It is something we Barkers really look forward to.  The only time of year I will come near a hot dog or marshmallows.  So anyway here are some photos of the blessed event.

My very first blog entry!!!

So I found my old friend Ezra's blog today and was inspired that men could in fact blog.  I've never blogged before so I hope I don't totally screw this up.  One thing I've always loved about blogs that I read is how much everyone talks about their great spouses.  So my first entry will be about how great my wife is.  I'll try to keep it short since I still have to read my scriptures, do genealogy, and fast and pray tonight.  So the number 1 thing I love and appreciate about Katie is how nice she is.  She has a very good heart and is very patient with our crazy boys.  Its feel like I have to try really hard to be a "good" person but Katie just naturally is a good person....  I better go because Katie is yelling at me to get off the computer.  I have so much more to write but I don't like to get yelled at.

Wednesday, May 7, 2008

Oregon trip




while lance was working at a clinic in Portland for 2 weeks the boys and I got to spend some time with Grammy and Grandpa. The boys had fun with Grandpa on the tractor, 4 wheelers, and of course, his Harley!  Grandma worked her magic on Darren and was able to get him to go on the potty!  We also enjoyed the tulip festival in Woodburn and a gorgeous day at the coast!